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loss - amillz lyrics

[intro]
yeah
listen the whole way through
this ones deep

[verse 1]
i wish i could tell you how much you really mean
i wish things were different and not how they seem
livin a life without you its just seems like a dream
a hole in my heart i just wanna f-cking scream
i wish i could find a way to get you f-cking back
i know that’s impossible with this power that i lack
not even money could it takes more than a stack
im feelin derailed when i rappin on this track

[verse 2]
don’t know how to say any of these feelings
don’t know if its good or doing any healing
this deck was stacked now emotions do the dealing
taken away you not punished for stealing
how could you leave, after you’ve done so much
it’s been so long since i’ve felt your touch
all my memories i hold and i clutch
but they’re starting to fade away like a f-ckin grudge
i’d do anything just to hear your voice again
yall listenin tell me have ya lost a friend
when someone has to tell you its the f-ckin end
that person you never get to see again
i dont know where to go i dont know where to turn
i don’t know how to accept this pain when will i learn
you were always fighting i always had concern
this pain is locked in my heart and all it does is burn

[verse 3]
i wish i could’ve saved you i wish i could’ve tried
or at least say i love you before you f-cking died
i always think about you when i look up in the skies
seen you just weeks before with the life in your eyes
you always gave me courage and you always gave me hope
so tell me why the f-ck were you in gods scope
all this pain inside its so hard to cope
this is my letter to you but i got no envelope

-break-

[verse 4]
i remember hearing the scream from my mom
it was 2am and i could tell something wrong
she said nan died and my thoughts broke the calm
i didn’t say a word, cuz i tried acting strong
i went back to my bed, thought about her dead
it made me feel like there was a bullet in my head
what had just been said, what had just been said!
theres no f-cking way that my nan could be dead
later in the day b dropped her plans
i just sat and cried right in her hands
i’m so thankful for her on that f-ckin day
even after all the dumb sh-t that i say
even sent her a text a year to the day
i wish you wouldve responded but i get it, its okay
you even went to the funeral, you stuck by my side
you were the only reason i got through it when she died
so this is my thank you, i know you won’t reply
this song is for you nan, i hope your not mad i cried
i never got to tell you, all the things i did
you never got to see me graduate cuz god forbid
i hope you’re happy with the family that you’re with
just to see you one more time, that’s my only wish

- amillz lyrics

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