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99 problems but mitt ain't one(obama rally) - alphacat lyrics

campaign problems? i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one!

no matter how he trolls, imma make him fold
i’m hard to stop got that ‘bruce leroy glow.’

my critics would say it’s time for me to go and so i will…
to my next presidential oath!

a challenge for me? no, i’m not really sold
but it’s whatever let’s go! come at me, bro!
how’s he coming for me, but barely shook santorum?
i’m so ready for dude wish i could press fast forward!

this ain’t a challenge it’s just a way to blow off steam
he can’t be serious walking around in those mom jeans!
and with that imma ask, “y u mad?”
i got his whole team scrambling trying to find him some swag. suckers!

i don’t know what you take me as
or understand the intelligence that ‘prezzy b.’ has
man, i’m out here trying to function! trust me i ain’t done!
i got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one! hit me!

99 problems, but mitt ain’t one!
having campaign problems i feel bad for you, son!
i got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!!

the year’s 2012 and i’m feeling strong
like a boxer in his corner, man, come on let’s get it on!
got two choices ya’ll keep it diplomatic or… mop the floor with him. straight treat him like a ch-r-

i eat compet-tion so let me say my grace
got them campaign dollars i can fight the case
i’m sure the press has questions i hope don’t make me snore-

[1′ st press guy]
-hey, mr. pres, do you know why they’re doubting you for?

[obama]
cause i’m prez and i’m black and my voice is a little low? do i look like a mind reader, sir? i don’t know!

is that all the questions or do we have some more?

[2nd press guy]
president obama!
over here!
to your left… on the floor!

[obama]
uh huh?

[2nd press guy]
mitt’s been acting like he thinks he’s gonna go far
are you worried about debating? that’s a pivotal part

[obama]
worried about it? not a bit. debate sk!lls are legit!

[2nd press guy]
and can you tell us what your strategy will be against mitt?

[obama]
well, it’s an all-out -ssault and i ain’t showing no love
what i look like losing to a dude named after a glove?!

[2nd press guy]
thank you

[3rd press guy]
rhyming your words like that…
are you some type of poet or something or maybe a rapper or something?!

[obama]
well, i’m no jay-z, but i do know this…that i spit flames and there’s no extinguisher for it!

[3rd press guy]
and we’ll see how right you are when election day comes!

[obama]
i got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!
99 problems, but mitt ain’t one
having campaign problems i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!
99 problems, but mitt ain’t one
having campaign problems i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!

now once upon a time not that long ago…
a man like myself was out campaigning for dough!
now imma boss getting stepped to by a rookie
i’m like a door, because i’ve got ‘pull’, yet he’s trying to push me
i’ve tried to ignore him, talk to the lord and pray for him…
but this mitt dude just loves to ‘perform’
you know the type all bark and no bite and about as intimidating as a fruit fly
the only thing that’s gonna happen is my base will get to clapping and… imma get hyphy cause i know what’s about to happen…then there i go attracting the democrats again…uh oh, ya man wins landslide again!

going against me he should’ve been more discerning
he gon’ swear he got robbed he’ll probably call his attorney
i’ ve got medics ready to take his campaign out on a gurney…
i’ll slay dude so bad i’ll have him doing ‘the bernie’

no etch-a-sketch could sketch his sketch campaign slash comedy sketch
imma ‘chalk outline it’… put it to rest
i wanna see his face when i’ve won!

i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!
99 problems, but mitt ain’t one
having campaign problems i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!
99 problems, but mitt ain’t one
having campaign problems i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one. hit me!

thank you, thank you
god bless you

campaign problems? i feel bad for you, son!
i’ve got 99 problems, but mitt ain’t one

you’re crazy for this one, joe!
it’s your prez!

“o!”

- alphacat lyrics

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