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calculatus eliminatis - allan sherman lyrics

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[cat in the hat]
when you’ve mislaid a certain something
keep your cool and don’t get hot
calculatus eliminatis
is the best friend that you got
calculatus eliminatis
always helps an awful lot
the way to find a missing something
is to find out where it’s not

it isn’t there, i’ll mark this x, i’ll mark that y
it isn’t underneath the apple, “h”, “k”, “i”

[conrad,spoken]
it isn’t under this keyhole

[cat in the hat]
no?

[sally,spoken]
and it isn’t on my knee

[cat in the hat, spoken]
hmm, mark the keyhole “k*300” and the knee “5*7b”

[cat in the hat, sung]
we just jot down all the places
where it isn’t, and gee whiz
very shortly we will locate where the
missing object is
[conrad,spoken]
it isn’t here

[cat in the hat,spoken]
“8*42j”

[sally,spoken]
and it isn’t there

[cat in the hat,spoken]
“f*607.” you can mark the piano “22,000*decimal point*11”

[sally,spoken]
it isn’t in the icebox

[cat in the hat,spoken]
that’s strange

[conrad,spoken]
it’s not on this tv

[cat in the hat,spoken]
off. icebox “o*two*four and a half”, tv “one million and three”

when you’ve mislaid a certain something
keep your cool and don’t go to pot
calculatus eliminatis
is the best friend that you got
calculatus eliminatis
always helps an awful lot
the way to find a missing something
is to find out where it’s not

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