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life's a bitch but then you die (faith) - alan poe lyrics

[intro]
(mic check 1, 2)
(mic check)
(take a trip through my mind)

[first verse]
if i try and find religion will i find faith?
if i try and find my vision will i find my fate?
if i go to church to seek some wisdom will i feel my soul set aflame?
are these the words of a saint with a past, or a sinner seeking a future in vain?
are we destined to repeat the same mistakes time and time again at every turn like a broken tape or take what we carry inside in stride?
questions that i ask myself as i drive through the night
alone in my mind
alone in my thoughts, alone in my ride
all alone in my life
my silhouette the only friend i’ve known all along
he’s along for the drive but even he don’t know if i’ll make it home alive tonight
‘cuz the way that life’s been going lately it’s kinda crazy
i’m being driven to the edge
word to stan
i just want to jump off the deep end
and be done with this once and for all
and i feel so ashamed to complain
but i can’t front no more with a fake smile that isn’t mine
and baby
if you don’t mind laying here for a while
you could be the reason to keep me here tonight
let it be known before i die
that i tried with every ounce of strength bled from my veins
i’ve been strong for so long i forgot what weakness felt like
i’ve been strong for so long that i left a permanent stain in the way you look at life
and the rest a blind spot or at least i hope
alcohol turned to blood through every slice, turned to love every time
an addict with no remedy but the knife
seeking peace with a blade
a paradox as i take a piece to the brain
i aim with one in the chamber
i’ve been ready to end this life
going out like kurt cobain
taking shots to the head but before i pull the trigger
i ask myself

[bridge]
what’s a god to a non believer?
will suicides go to heaven, or never rest in h-ll?
i could die right now
jump in the flames and disappear forever
if that’s the case then i’ll make my case to make my last moment the best ever before the bullet casing takes over
the last one to last forever
(the last one to last forever)

[second verse]
am i a coward if don’t do it sober?
the constant struggle between my hemispheres has been the only thing that, keeps me here
‘cuz as soon as i stop fighting i’ll find serenity and end this fear
(i’ll find serenity and end this fear)
i’m plagued by demons, so i try and drown them in a pool of liquor
try to suffocate them in bottles and smoke, but that’s not the antidote, they resurface and breathe out the most
no matter how much i try, i don’t believe the struggle is worth it
if the means are justified by the end, then i can’t find a reason to still pretend
if i put my faith in myself, does that make me a sinner, a non believer, a demon, unfaithful
does the end really justify the means, intricate thoughts i have as i go to sleep
seeking but never finding peace in my dreams, they’re a cruel joke
nightmares, and night terrors, no rest for the wicked
hoping if i rest that i never rise and wake, putting my life at stake with a bottle of pills
hoping. hoping. hoping
chasing
as crafty as he is he evades my chase
instead her cursed lips come and take his place
his cousin seducing me to lay my head down once and for all
a cold whisper at the edge of my pillow says it all:
“just close your eyes, and it’ll be alright”
she loves to crawl in my bed, and make love to me
she’s in love with me, she loves me unconditionally, and so do i

life’s a b-tch but then you die

and you find the most beautiful flower
fair and without prejudice she takes us all the same, and that’s why i love her
my soul mate
my last lover
my grave will be a modest totem to the life i’ve led
i’m ready

so come and take me death

- alan poe lyrics

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