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hold it in - aaa lyrics

a fraction of a thought only half compels me, but i hold it in like a bong hit. i right my wrongs but they are written down on a seat filled with emotionless thoughts just as soon as i’ve moved on from it. she says i’ve changed but i say this outfit i’ve worn many times. some decrease with age but my folded demeanor is like fine wine. jeans fold at the waist like a poker game, she says i was a mistake with expectations of me denying it, if anything, i think the same. the point of life isn’t to accentuate those who hurt me, but to learn from it and not let it happen again. i’ve learned lessons that have allowed me to lessen depression, but two dollar glue from cvs doesn’t help two broken hearts on the mend

this letter isn’t like previous mail i’ve sent, might even request it be returned to sender. regret personifies our thoughts towards us, makes me want to make a fruit salad with my tendencies towards you and put it in a f-cking blender. i don’t blame you for everything, truth is i take some responsibility for our downfall. and when i think about all that it has done for me, it doesn’t make me frown at all

i needed you to teach me lessons. you a teacher but my knowledge you lessened. brainwash me with your choice words, but my brainflow in a washer and pour bleach into my learning curve. here i sit writing what is sometimes illegibly sucked into my mind, dyslexic in my head but emotionally i remain behind. sitting in a snow-covered hallway hallucinating over what i wish to be my reality. a reality filled with personal enlightenment and stability, if this reality was a clock, the hands would never strike 11:11 in actuality

my positives i refuse to go over, legitimate emotions already reviewed and not worth putting on the test. i would put that into four plays, but i’ve already sucked that breast. that line didn’t make sense, oh how fitting. unfortunately that’s the only thing about my center that fits in. that lie didn’t make cents, but not all of our corruption reeps active benefits, but death is a park i’ll gladly take a stroll in. individualistic comparisons inhibit personal growth, cause we all have our own paddles but float in different boats

- aaa lyrics

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