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the ballad of randy - 64studios101 lyrics

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[verse 1]
married my wife
she wanted s*x
but all my life
i’ve abstained on reflex

thought i was ace
but the world disagrees
now i must face
the flaws in my testes

went to the doc
mr. house md
he said “let’s talk
man, i will set you free”

“brain scan?” he asked
i said “i’ll humor you”
when done, he basked
then yelled “brain tumor, whoo!”

[chorus]
thanks, house md
s*xuality
ain’t real
when it starts with ace (oh)
and now i see
to live happily
i’ll need
an amorous embrace

[verse 2]
“your life’s a drag”
house said, sounding moved
“but you will sh*g
when the tumor’s removed”

“great!” i exclaimed
“i’ll stop being a freak
once i am maimed
my s*m*n, it will leak”

my wife kayla
yeah, her smile shone
she said “hey ya!
how about we bone?”

the tumor gone
well, i said “heck, yes!”
now i’m turned on
i’m no longer s*xless
[final chorus]
thanks, house md
s*xuality
ain’t real
when it starts with ace (oh)

and now i see
to live happily
i’ll need
an amorous embrace
i’ll need
an amorous embrace
i’ll need
an amorous embrace

[outro]
and so, i am now self*actualized, thanks to house md! that’s right, i’m normal now, meaning that i have copious amounts of s*x with my wife. oh, how i love my s*x*filled and thus problem*free life. ok, bye!

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