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wading in an almost empty pool, imagining as if it’s the ocean - 156/silence lyrics

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a long night erosion from standing in front of the mirror trying to define this fine line of judgement and peer pressure

i can no longer find my balance, this false sense of composure isn’t making any progress
always reaching for a hand that is all imagination
grasping for affection that exists inside my head

and i’m always standing alone

look at these couples, they flood the street
look at their hands, they’re coupling
this pheromonal atmosphere is suffocating me as i search for redemption… as i search for recovery

the truth is i’m standing alone
and i hope this is almost over

and what does it mean when i say that i’ve come clean?
i’ve turned myself inside out so please just help me figure out who i was.. who i’m suppose to be
and i’ll warn you: there’s things you’ll see that will make you so disappointed in me

and i see these demons that are tearing me in two
as i’m struggling to stand on my own two feet
please just help me figure out who i could be and tell me what i need as i’m losing ground

and it’s hard to say that i’m not ok
and it’s hard to say that i need help
and it’s hard to say that i’m not ok, but i will be one day

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